we used to go dancing,
casual, not an event.
I could kiss any stranger
I wanted to
for a time.
tonight after dinner
with straight friends
our talk of problems
without clever solutions or clear ends,
of actual life and actual death,
I went out
alone in my boots
pocket full of advil,
face full of
my actual age
and sang into the mouth of a
person I would not kiss.
I did not want to kiss any
of the twenty somethings
I danced with, actually.
champagne animals
tossing ourselves
in and out of time.
no one to stop me
from living again.
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