After Lucille Clifton

I am limping into a new year
the old years piled up at my back
everyone I’ve lost pulling at my feet
each step heavy and slow
I know this will be the year 
I break some hearts
including my own
I was six when I promised 
to always be good and I’ve kept 
my promise 
I have years of evidence
it will be hard to let go
and I beg what I love and 
I leave to forgive me